Monday, December 13, 2010

Making It

For a lot of people the definition of "making it" equals a nice paying job, a warm and comfy home, plenty of food, a good car, and some money in the bank for a few toys, vacation, and retirement. And if you've really made it you might even have a degree or two, a fancy title, and that corner office! Admittedly, it all sounds like a pretty good definition of making it—but at what cost?

I guess you could say I "made it"—if having a variety of the above is any indication. A high-paying job, fancy title, a nice big office along with all the perks that come with such things. Yes, I certainly had made it—especially when you consider my background.

I grew up in a "holler" back in the hills of West Virginia. Where the winding dirt road took you past shack-like houses desperately holding on to the crumbly hillside. The road curved right until you couldn't go any further right—nearly touching itself on the tail end before going left—a "kiss your ass" curve, I heard them called. Twelve Pole creek ran along the other side of the road—a swift current, carving the land and sometimes flooding houses, like ours, sitting just above the muddy banks. We got indoor plumbing just as I entered first grade, I was five. We finally had "city water" by the time I was ten or so. Our house was always being built, while at the same time falling down. Number eight of nine kids, I've spent my entire life trying to "make it" out of that holler.  

Although, I did finally "make it" I was having a hard time accepting "it" as "the" it. Was "this" really "it"—the "thing" people longed for, what I longed for? Was this what it's like outside the confines of holler-life? Really? After a long and steady career, albeit, a good one, it lacked that "thing" I'd longed for back in the day when I lived in such isolation. Paradoxically, I found myself feeling stuck, isolated, confined, once again.

In light of my upbringing, I found myself feeling guilty for thinking this way—desiring something even better. But, I wanted a life doing work I loved—work that added a little extra kick in my step every now and again. I'd worked diligently for many years and had established a solid career—what was wrong? How ungrateful of me to no longer want "it". But, all I knew was that something inside of me was dying; numbing my senses. After a few wake-up calls, I started paying attention and responded to them one baby step at a time.

I attended classes, lectures, workshops and own more self-help books than anyone I know, hundreds. My book shelves are literally overflowing with "how-to" do this or that or what to do when this or that happens.  These books have been a wonderful aid, but in the end, my inspiration was found, not from anyone else, but that kid from the holler. Not until I stopped and got to know her a little better did I find the courage, belief—and inspiration—to seek my true calling. With shear will and determination she did it, she "made it". How in the world did she do that—get from "there" to "here"? Just like some of the self-help authors I'd read, I felt a strong need to meet this person. She inspired me! It was time to get to know her. Getting to knowing her, ME, has, quite literally, transformed my life.

We've each accomplished or overcome great things in life. You have certainly done at least one thing in life to make your situation better. What was it and how did you do it? If you can draw on this, get reacquainted with that person, a renewed sense of energy and clarity will come to propel you even further toward your true calling, your Truth, I like to say. She—the "you" that "made it"—is the teacher, trusted friend, or confidant you've been craving. To help find this person think about these questions. When you were stuck or faced with an obstacle, how did you move through it? What was holding you back? What strength did you draw on? How did you get to the high points in your life? Who did you lean on? Answering these questions move you, not "away" from something, but "toward" your Truth. We need strong community and should lean on the trusted souls around us, but, ultimately, no one but you can really "make it" happen. It all comes back to that will and determination inside of you!

We each have different reasons for postponing the act of "living our truth"—mine was a combination of things, but mostly guilt. I had it good and logic said, "stay put, you have a secure and stable life just like you always wanted". Good God girl, you've "made it" out of that holler! I felt as if I were disrespecting God himself by giving up my job. After all, I had come a long way baby! Eventually, though, the consequences—which included stress-related illnesses and a couple of "close-call" accidents—won over as I was forced to surrender to the guilt and let my heart take the lead. Miraculously, God provided even more abundance and more gifts as I kept saying yes to meet each new opportunity. That's the way it works! Saying "yes" is like putting in your order off the menu of life. The Universe is waiting, listening. And you can be as detailed as you like; the more specific the better, in fact.

If you are not happy with your work, regardless of how you got there or how "good" you have it, I urge you to start taking a look at some clues, your feelings and energy level, and begin working with them. One thing I did was ask myself a basic question and began the task of designing my life to support the answer. The question was simple: what do I love? My answer was threefold and came easily as I sat quietly with pen in hand. Write, teach, and serve. These answers were based on what I knew gave me that "kick" I was looking for. Although maybe not the most brilliant writer at times, I loved it and had always known this about myself. I had been given various opportunities to teach both in my career and through volunteer work—so I already knew I loved teaching. My love for working in service to others was proven through volunteering I'd done over the years. So, I knew my answers, but only found them through the process of living my life, all of it. Through paying attention to which activities shifted my emotions and energy did I find the answers that led me toward my Truth.

Today, my newly-designed life aligns perfectly with my answers. I am writing my first book and have more in the queue. My new business in the healing arts gives me the privilege of working in service to others, where I enjoy regular teaching opportunities.

Would I say I have finally "made it"? Well, yes, but I say that with caution. I've learned that to say you've "made it" blocks more abundance from entering your life. Instead, we must approach each day with gratitude for what we've "made" so far and work to create more with each new day. I've learned the importance to "make it" toward something that inspires you instead of away from something that doesn't. Putting effort "toward" something increases the positive energy—pulling you toward your true calling. It is called the law of magnetism—whatever you focus on is what you draw into your life. And, yes, there are many books on the "law of magnetism" and I do recommend reading a few. But, chances are, you've already been attracting many things; you just didn't realize it was "you" in the driver's seat! All your thoughts are requests off life's menu. Imagine just for one day that every single thought you have will manifest into physical form. What would your day look like? Change your thoughts, change your ability to "make it" or not.

In order to really "make it" we've got to understand that all our roles and experiences in life are created by us—all of them—and they're chockfull of lessons. We ourselves, are the wellspring of knowledge on "how to" do anything! We alone have the answers, but we must first find the courage to lift the veil of delusion if we expect to benefit from the wisdom beneath.

For example, without my previous job—the one I thought I hated—I would not have gained the understanding, appreciation, or perspective to help others or skills to run a business. If you are in a job you hate, learn to love the aspects of it that could aid your next gig. If you don't know what that next gig is, just know that every moment with every person, experience, or situation, offers something to take forward as you work to "make it". Honor your accomplishments. Discover yourself all over again.

And you don't have to quit your job to follow your dream. You can do it in parallel, like I did. You may eventually decide to leave your current job, but for now, just use it as a place to gain new skills and sustain your preferred lifestyle as you design your new one. Remove any pressures or expectations from others who are telling you to just up and quit! That's OK advice for some, but only do this if it feels right—each person is individual. We all have our own speed for driving on the freeway; and it's the same in life—drive at a speed that's comfortable for "you". You will then arrive at your destination fully prepared, with a sense of balance, great satisfaction and peace.

Making it of course does include the comforts of a nice home, car, food, and the like. But you've only partially made it if you're sacrificing your Truth to get it—that is to say, doing work you don't love. Some people can get along just fine in this role, but, if you're like me, a delusion-filled life strips away the one "thing" I've always wanted—a sense of purpose and meaning.

In the spirit of—"out with the old and in with the new"—as the year comes to a close, bring your awareness to what you love, what you want to go "toward" and then design your plan of action. I recently made a detailed schedule as I prepare for the new year. It has helped me clarify how I wish to spend each day. Without doing this exercise, the time I've gained from leaving my old career likely would have been taken up with non-essential, low -priority, tasks that do not support my next stab at "making it". The task of writing all my activities down on paper was quite humbling and forced me to set priorities. I encourage you to give it a try. It's harder, and also more helpful, than you might think!

What a blessing to witness another person joyfully "making it" while living their Truth! My wish this Holiday season is the gift of witnessing you "Speak Your Truth". That's all I want for Christmas :o)

***If you want to learn more about some of the tools that have helped me move through one transition after another come to my next Chakra Talk class—Speaking Your Truth—this Wednesday, December 15, 7:00 PM at East West Bookshop of Seattle. The cost is only $10.00. Or, contact me via my web site. I am happy to give you some tips, answer questions, or provide resources to help point you in the right direction.

***I have also decided to offer a 3-month mentoring program where we'll cover not only energy medicine basics, but also how to connect with your true calling, and how to start your own healing practice. If you are interested, please let me know and I will provide details.

***I will be teaching my last "Chakra Talk!" class of the year at East West Bookshop in Seattle on December 15 at 7:00PM. We will be discussing the 5th Chakra — Speaking Your Truth! For more information or to sign up visit, http://www.eastwestbookshop.com/events/single_event.php?ID=2148.

Also, look for information on how to meditate and other helpful tools at my "Trinity of Truth" web site, http://thetrinityoftruth.blogspot.com/.